Women are....

What comes to mind when you hear “women are….”?

Is it: strong, brave, kind, nurturing, determined, confident, driven, successful, competent, unique, elegant, sincere.

Or something like: mothers, daughters, sisters, wives, grandmothers, great-grandmothers, aunts, cousins, nieces, friends, colleagues.

We are all of those things and so much more.

We are women.

I have been thinking a lot about the phrase “women are…. (fill in the blank)”. And how for so many years, decades really, we have been taught and told who we are. But not only just that, but how to feel, to act, to parent, to work… the list goes on.

I believe the tables are turning.

This is the time where women get to tell the world who they are. Our job now is to rise by lifting others because empowered women, EMPOWER WOMEN. We, as females, have been taught to compete with each other because there is not enough room for the both of us. And while sadly that may have been true, not any more. We will make room and it starts with including our sisters. We are going to gracefully dance our way to the front, hand in hand with our tribe of women. We will teach others how we should be viewed, received, respected, and believed. We get to write a new story and it starts today.

You are enough just the way you were created and you need to show the world who you are!

We are women.

xoxo - McKenna : Operations / Brand Director

#nationalwomensequalityday

#nationalwomensequalityday

The fact that this is a day….blows my mind.

We, as a country, have struggled (are struggling) with the word 'equality’. Whether it’s with race, ethnicity, gender, there has not been equal equity given. This lack of equality for decades has spurred conversations, marches, non-profits, speeches, companies, and so much more. Woman have had enough.

That is where we come in.

Our heartbeat at NuShu Sisters is that not only women are seen as equal, but that all people see the value in joining the fight for equality. We need women. But, we also need men to help in this fight. Women are the backbone of this country and this world we call home, they deserve to be seen and honored as such. What are ways that you can elevate women in your life? Support them? Advocate for them? Fight for them? There will be a day that - E V E R Y D A Y - will be women’s equality day!

Are you with us?!

xoxo - McKenna : Operations / Brand Director

Why Being a NuShu Sister is Sometimes Hard

It inevitably happens to me, and I'm sure you have experienced this too. 

You have this deep calling in your heart to get along with other females; you put your best foot forward, your happy pants on, and you're ready to spread love, compliments, and encouragement to every woman you meet.

And then it happens.

Another female does something wrong towards you, is mean to you, says a snide comment about you or to you, and it takes every ounce of composure in you to not pull out your fighting words.

Come on ladies, you know what I'm talking about. So you do this new NuShu Sister thing and you open up about how that made you feel, or you apologize for your offense or whatever it may be... and the woman doesn't respond the way you had hoped. Instead, she mocks you or hurts you even deeper. 

Has this ever happened to you? Maybe in some capacity? 

Sometimes it's difficult for women to see other women as anything BUT competition. They hate your hair, they hate your dress, you're too loud, you wear designer jeans, you don't wear designer jeans... the list of petty excuses for a female to take jabs at another female could go on and on. 

Sometimes, it's difficult to be a NuShu Sister. 

I'm here to bring you good news. You know, we've talked all about what being a NuShu Sister IS, but I think it's just as important to talk about and convey what a NuShu Sister ISN'T. 

So here we go. 3 things that I believe being a NuShu Sister is NOT:

1. Being a NuShu Sister is NOT just letting girls and women be mean to you for whatever reason they pick. 

I will never condone being mean or disrespectful to anyone else... including YOURSELF. As women, we have to respect ourselves, love ourselves, and often teach other women how we should be treated. This comes when we learn to love others from whatever distance that takes. It is hard not to want to, A. be mean back to another woman or B. suck up to them, walk on eggshells, or go out of your way to win their approval to like you. Girls, you may need to take a deep breath, take a large step back, and not consider someone a "friend" who is constantly hurting you. Be nice, be considerate, but never let someone run all over you for whatever reason they pick. 

2. Being a NuShu Sister is NOT keeping your emotions suppressed for the sake of keeping the peace. 

Okay, so this is one that I think a lot of women deal with, or one that I've heard women come to me for in many relationships. Often times women find it best to not share their feelings with another female, but instead try to act tough and put together. I would say this, tell the other person how you are feeling and the reasons for your hurts. If that person empathizes with you and attempts to mend the friendship, then great! However, if the other person is cold, plays victim, or is non-empathetic to what you're saying, don't take it personally. Maybe she doesn't know how to deal with confrontation, or maybe she is insecure in some way. Don't worry. Once you've made your peace and shared what is on your heart- leave it at the door! You did your part. That leads me to my next and final point...

3. Being a NuShu Sister is NOT being best friends with every other female you meet. 

Sometimes girls and women just need distance. I wrote a blog on my personal site, Ten Rows Back, that talks all about this. To my surprise it resonated with many many women. 
See, I always thought that being a NuShu Sister meant that I just had to take the punches from mean women, and "turn the other cheek" every time. 

No.

Stop this. 

There is no way that every woman will be best friends with one another. In a perfect world, yes. However, there are women who believe the complete opposite of what NuShu Sisters even stands for. How could you possibly expect to be besties with them, when they don't believe in your sole heartbeat for and towards other women? I have been told straight to my face that female relationships will never work, and that it's stupid to even try to encourage women to come together. Talk about heart breaking. 

Don't carry the pressure or burden of being best friends with every female or live a life with this weight of having to get along with every single person. You be the best you that you can be by loving yourself and loving others. Sometimes, like I said, that means from a distance, other times, it means a beautiful collaboration with other women. Don't get down on yourself if someone doesn't like you, accept you, or want to get in on this NuShu Sister thing. 

You are ENOUGH. Be you. Be your own kind of beautiful from the inside out, and don't let anyone put a damper on your NuShu spirit! Keep in mind that another female out there needs love from you specifically, and that's all it takes to start a revolution of women who will make this a kinder world for girls and women to live in. 

Katie Roberts
NuShu Sisters Culture Director 

What We Can Learn From Tina Fey

So as you may have known or watched, the Golden Globes were on this week.

And like anyone, I couldn't help but notice that Tina Fey was one of the hosts this year. Now, we all probably have different views on her, I respect that, and it's not like I'm "fan-girling" over her in this post, so bear with me!

However, I came across a quote she said at one time, and at first it rubbed me wrong... until I sat and thought about it.

You'll find the quote with her picture below. Read it. Think for a minute about what she's conveying.

Like I said, at first I thought, wow someone really loves themselves to say that!

Then I had an epiphany. What if every woman felt that way about herself? What if we (you and me) truly, deep down, felt that we were amazing just for simply being who we are?

There is something inside me that craves to start being more proud of myself. No, not prideful, but happy and amazed at my unique technique on how I take on life and the circumstances around me. I want to face life's challenges head on, the good and the bad, and come out being amazed at how I did. As women we tend to beat ourselves up too much. I remember having a conversation with Jenn one day, and she said that it's true- when something goes wrong, a woman more times than not will blame herself for the outcome. Ladies, let's stop looking down on ourselves, and start being amazed at what we have to offer to this world and those around us! Let's live confident lives that radiate our genuine selves.

So today ladies, I challenge you! Look in the mirror, and be amazed with yourself! Sit back, and realize that you do a heck of a lot, you're a strong, beautiful, unique individual that has something special to make this world sparkle a little more by your very presence.

Be encouraged today NuShu Sisters!

4 Ways To Live Confidently And Empower Other Women

Hey ladies! Katie here!

I have been wanting to post about this for a while now, and now that my travels have quieted down I am able to sit and write out my thoughts! Have you ever wondered HOW to start empowering other women, or wanted to jump on the NuShu Sisters train, but just don't know where to start? Well look no further! I, with the help of Jenn (Founder and Visionary for NuShu Sisters, as well as licensed therapist), have come up with a couple ways to help you get along better initially with women. For many women I understand it is hard to trust other women again after being deeply hurt. I also understand that sometimes women can just flat out not be nice (myself included at times!!). My goal is to help enable you to cultivate relationships that carry on when maybe the start was good but life got messy in the process of building a female friendship.

Here are four things you can do to live confidently around other women and live a life that compliments and empowers.

1. Learn to appreciate and admire the beauty

This can be as simple as going for a walk and noticing the beauty of nature all around you, or complimenting your best friend or mom when you notice she's taken a little extra time on her hair that day. When you see a woman, stop yourself (quiet the screaming insecurities inside of you), and appreciate her for who she is, and how she is created. The more you learn to appreciate beauty, the less your insecurities will threaten you when encountering other women.

2. Befriend confident women

I'm not saying that you only friend the ones who come off confident (no one is perfect, and every woman has something unique to offer). However, I am saying that if you notice a woman who gives positive contributions to those around her- become her friend! Become friends with those who are secure in themselves, honest, and gentle.  Does she light up a room when she enters? Is she an encourager? Surround yourself with these types of women, and they will soon rub off on you!

3. Benefit of the doubt- give it!

Many times I find myself feeling offended by what another women may or may not say. However, I have recently been trying to give the benefit of the doubt more freely. Not only does this help with the way you feel treated, it will cue other women in on how to treat you. Be quick to assume the best, and they should soon follow suit!

4. Compliment other women

I cannot express this enough! It is so important to compliment other women, as it allows their guards to come down, and make them feel as though you aren't competing with them. It can be complimenting their shoes, their smile, or even the way they did their makeup, whatever it is it will help them feel more accepted by you. This leads to a feeling of trust, that builds and starts great friendships, or even just changes the way they view themselves. Read about the time that I complimented a woman in the grocery store, and the impact it had on her.

I hope this helped you! Female friendships can feel so daunting at times, but taking these things into consideration, one step at a time, will lead you to healthy, positive female friendships that will flourish!

As A Therapist

“If there ever comes a time when the women of the world come together purely and simply for the benefit of mankind, it will be a force such as the world has never known.”

As a therapist, I was struck by the deep pain girls and women carry from the mistreatment they have suffered at the hands and words of others, and the lack of support they offer each other or were being offered by their communities. Consistently, I was shocked at the lack of support, resources, and awareness on girls’ issues of girl bullying, self-inflicted pain like eating disorders, cutting, promiscuity, and abuse issues. Not only were girls and women often misunderstood and not properly assisted, but issues would be exasperated due to the lack of resources and poor help.

I cringed as I observed society and media cheering on girls and women of all ages to turn on each other as the “mean girl” character who is then celebrated and rewarded with fame and wealth. To see girls hurting and being rejected by peers was disturbing, but then to see them bullied, humiliated, and harassed by other females, peers, and society was absolutely distressing. I wanted to yell, “ENOUGH!” to the barrage of messages our girls and women were getting that was exasperating critical issues, and attacking their fragile self-esteems. I found myself telling women “YOU ARE ENOUGH!” but my voice seemed small in the sea of voices yelling loudly, “YOU’RE NOT ENOUGH!”

Here are the issues that women of our world are confronted with daily:

-Over 10 million girls suffer from an Eating Disorder in the U.S. (Did you know that this is thenumber one mental illness with the highest mortality rate?)

-Cutting and other self-inflicted pain is a growing trend for adolescent girls, and often mistreated and misunderstood by professionals and society

-Girl bullying is a national and global issue at EVERY age

-Media continues to offer unrealistic images of women that damage the spirit and self-esteem of our young girls who grow up to be mothers of young girls

-Women and children are our largest poverty group and most victimized people group

-The sexual exploitation of females grows at an alarming rate around our world

-Fair work wages for women continue to be marginalized as they make less than men

-Poor or no legal ramifications or legal advocacy is provided to women of domestic violence in many places in our world

To add to my frustration, I often found myself advocating for girls and women in our society with limited resources, support, awareness or collaboration in my community. I began to collaborate with teams of professionals who were able to collaborate and treat the unique needs of women with care, compassion, and skill. But the need expands beyond what I or other quality professionals could offer. I knew we needed more.

In contrast, we at NuShu Sisters have noted the healing power that prevails when women were encouraged to talk, and bind together to empower each other.

NuShu Sisters is a non-profit movement designed to:

-      I N S P I R E women of all ages to create a new culture where women are collaborative and celebrating of each other versus being competitive and critical,

-       E M P O W E R girls and women to develop their authentic selves and educate society on the unique needs of women, and

-       P A R T N E R with other like-minded agencies and organizations to create one forum and counteract the fragmented care we are experiencing in our communities.

I am blessed and excited to be working with other fabulous and inspirational women who are walking beside me to create a nation of women who: speak a collaborative language, walk in their strength and beauty, and are cultivating an empowered culture for women. Join us! We’d love to have you be apart of this powerful movement.

“When sleeping women wake, mountains move.”

 

Founder and Visionary,

Jennifer Dean-Hill